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Or to take a magical ride on Jane’s Carousel, or reserve a table at that new restaurant, or hit the concert they’ve been wanting to see. Maybe you ask to be set up with a friend of a friend. Again, I tip my hat to you, but this is increasingly not how it works here. When a couple in a different city recounts the story of how they met, they would often rather lie and tell you it was in a strip club than suffer e-shame. After you’ve gone to the bars, and sent all the PMs, and swiped to the right on anyone who isn’t in a picture with their mom or a tiger (it happens! These are just a small fraction of the things that enter into your mind.

And you have to figure out how to get yourself there. Does waiting at the bar with a drink make you look totally chill, or like a raging alcoholic?

You don’t want to blow it immediately after your first by seeming too eager. There’s always another bar, another meet-up group, another Tinder match.

But you don’t want to let too much time pass, either.

You aren’t relegated to the movie theater at the local mall, and if you are going to see a movie you can go to places like Nitehawk and eat artisanal cheese while watching it.