Humorous dating tips same sex dating service

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.” Anonymous Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns?

I am thy Main Squeeze; thou shalt have no other squeeze before me. Thou shalt not take the name of thy Squeeze in vain, nor badmouth her behind her back. Remember our Anniversary, and keep it holy–or else. – Shirley Temple “Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to give it a try again. But, as can be seen by all, chicken is neither a meat nor a vegetable.

(I have to mention here that everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food had poisoned me. A guy comes into a coffee shop and places his order: “I want 3 flat tires & a pair of headlights” The waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, goes to the kitchen & asks the cook, “This guy out there just ordered 3 flat tires & a pair of headlights. ” “No,” the cook says, “3 flat tires means 3 pancakes & a pair of headlights is 2 eggs sunny side up.” “Oh,” says the waitress. ” “Everybody talks in different ways” she tried to explain.

I truly hope and pray that my stories will give you, especially wives, many ideas on how to make your marriages more romantic. --Bill Quinn March 2, 2015 This is the first new story I've written for this site since November, 2012.