I can’t go into as much depth as I’d like to in this post, but men and women have different senses of how they’d like to be noticed for things (and what they’d like to be noticed for.) At the root of it, when a man feels like he make a woman happy, he will not want to be in a relationship with her (or if he stays, he will not want to deepen it). Back to neediness: When a woman starts acting needy, especially in the beginning of a relationship, it shows up as the ultimate red flag. Neediness is synonymous with ’emotional dependency’, as in: “This woman is dependent on the guy in order for her to feel good.” Now, sometimes when I start explaining this, I’ll get a comment saying, “Oh so what? You can have it all, too, but what I’m trying to explain in this article is that you don’t get it from it.On the other hand, when a woman acknowledges him for all the things he’s doing well, he will almost certainly want to deepen the relationship and stay in it. We’re supposed to be emotional robots with no feelings or desires and just accept anything a guy is doing without complaint? You create a relationship with those qualities by inspiring those things within the relationship."Why put arbitrary parameters on something so important?
The problem with neediness is that instead of inspiring all of those positive relationship qualities, the “needy person” acts as if their partner is denying them those good relationship qualities…
like they’re entitled to them and their partner is cruelly withholding it.
Barrie is a bestselling author with 11 books and counting.
What about my voice or communication style makes you want to spend less time around me? What do you expect from me that you should really be expecting of yourself? What are you willing to do with or for me that you haven’t been able to do in previous relationships? What are your deepest dreams and desires for yourself and for us?
When you are first in love, the boxers left on the floor are just adorable. But eventually, familiarity breeds, if not contempt, plenty of irritation.